This week I had a wobble

After having a really wonderful weekend that included Cybher (me time!) and Godstone farm (family & friend time), I felt like I'd got my life balance bang on! I was all happy that I'd had time for me, hanging out with blogging buddies and learning stuff to improve my blog and time with the people I love and being a mum.

Then Monday came and I woke up with a full on cold, head pounding, sinuses screaming and work to get to. My feeling that I'd got my life sorted and equal time for all things went out the window and I posted this on Facebook:

"Someone let me into this secret on how to be a good mum of 2, good wife, good employee, good housekeeper, just generally good at anything as at the moment I'm pretty shit at all the above!!!"

I'm lucky that I'm friends with lots of lovely mums who in times of need will either come up with practical solutions (get a cleaner) or just a bit of moral support - virtual hugs are always welcomed by me. Everyone reminded me that I have a wonderful family and that I'm probably putting too much pressure on myself to 'have it all'. Lower my expectations was the best advice. And I think I did do that in the early days when we'd just had Noah, but now I'm back at work there's a change in me that I don't like. I feel like I'm constantly having to prove myself. Take this week for example - instead of staying home and trying to get over the bad cold I've had, I've made myself go into work because I don't want to look bad, like I'm a slacker. When actually I'm far from it.

I know that there will be weeks when the overwhelming feeling is "I can't do this" and this is just one of them. But when you're feeling ill too the feeling magnifies by 100% and I really do question how us women do it. I like working I really do but it's putting an awful lot of pressure on me and my family. There is hardly a spare minute and everything feels like a juggling act and for someone who is used to being in control (I'm a project manager by occupation) my life feels like it's in a bit of a mess.

So my question is how do you do it? What tips do you have to keep yourself sane and feel like a good mum, wife, employee, housekeeper...there are so many roles these days that I wonder is it possible to be good at them all?

And as an extra note to this post, a really wonderful thing happened this morning that I will never forget. My lovely NCT friends sent me the most beautiful flowers (and chocolates!) and the card read:

"Just a little something to say you're fab and to make you smile"

I cannot thank them enough. It is the support of my friends and family that really helps me. I'm in no way 'suffering' in real terms but it's just so nice to have people look out for you and make gestures like this when you're feeling a bit low. Us mums should always look out for each other and spot when someone might just be needing a little boost or an ear to listen, it's tough sometimes in this parenting jungle!

Sand le Mere - A Family Holliday Village

When I found out that we had been offered a long weekend to Sand Le Mere, a holiday camp on the East Yorkshire coast I was really excited and I have to say that isn't something I thought I would ever find myself saying pre-kids. But now I find myself looking for places to go on holiday that will appeal to Isla as I know if she is having fun then we will all be happy. That's not to say I'm overlooking Noah but he's a bit younger, still a baby really.
The opportunity hit my inbox through the Tots100, and I seized on it as I don't think we'll be holidaying as a family this year other than for this short break. Also holidays aren't massively relaxing with 2 little ones under 3, but Sand Le Mere looks like it will cater to all our needs. It's recently had a a £4 million overhaul, so I'm expecting big things! There is a whole new pool complex, children's soft play, an entertainment block and the area is close to stunning countryside and also sandy beaches! What more could we want?
We'll be staying in a 'comfort' holiday home with 3 bedrooms. I'm hoping that it will be safe for our marauding explorer! It's equipped with all the mod cons that we need and to be honest I'm hoping we'll be spending more time out than in.
Times are a bit tough for families at the moment, but on looking at Sand Le Mere's pricing a holiday doesn't have to break the bank. If you're looking for a break then take a look at
www.sand-le-mere.co.uk and use this offer code EB10 to get 10% off breaks taken between 1st - 9th June, 20th July - 1st September and 26th October - 2nd November.

Looking forward to letting you all know about our holiday!

Frankie & Benny's - Review

Recently we were approached to review Frankie & Benny's - the restaurant chain. I immediately said yes as who's going to say no to a free meal??! We've had our voucher for over 6 week s now and we still hadn't made it there, for all sorts of reasons, me being back at work, illness etc. So finally we thought today is the day, we CANNOT be bothered to cook and tidy up afterwards, lets eat out!

After Isla's ballet lesson we set off to our local Frankie and Benny's in Croydon. I've been there before but not for a very long time as it's situated in an out of town retail park next door to a cinema, making it a great place to eat prior to the flicks or after you've done a bit of shopping. I was kind of looking forward to it and I kind of wasn't. The reason I wasn't is that meals out at the moment can be really hit and miss, Isla messes about a lot during meals, picking and playing around with her food, hardly consuming a morsel and Noah, well he's a baby and he can kick off at the drop of a hat. Both of these things happened but to be honest, I think the fact I wasn't cooking and cleaning up outweighed it.

So what happened?

We were shown to a table in a very calm and quiet restaurant - it was about 4.30pm, so our usual time for a family meal out given that bedtime is usually about 7 for the kids. Our waiter straight away gave the kids their little goodie bag with a coloured pencil and some colouring bits in it. He very quickly asked us for our drinks order and was on the ball about bringing a container with some hot water in it to warm Noah's food.

We looked at the menu and I did feel a bit overwhelmed, there is so much choice and in my honest opinion I don't like this. It makes me feel nervous that the kitchen is too stretched and how can it possibly get all those dishes right. I personally always like a smaller menu. When faced with this kind of menu I go to my default selection - a burger. I chose a Bacon Cheese burger with a side of coleslaw. I was impressed with the children's menu, it had lots of things that Isla would eat (Spag Bol, Fish Fingers) and she went for the Chicken Strip and fries. The OH copied me and had a Bacon Cheese Burger with a side of Spicy Onion Rings.

While we waited for our food Isla did her best to guzzle her apple juice as fast as she could so that she wouldn't have room for her dinner. I fed Noah his dinner and once it was finished he went on to demolish lots of snacks. We also had a great 'fart' moment, where Isla did a special 'parp' and then proceeded to go on to ask "Daddy didn't you get to the toilet in time?" Love her.

The food arrived and all was fine until I realised that I had a crispy bread crumbed chicken under my burger bun. I also saw the teeny tiny pot of Coleslaw on the side and thought, "Really? £2.55?" I let the waiter know that mine was wrong, he was fine about it, he'd misheard me. I got a replacement about 10 minutes later. Sorted. Well apart from the fact that it wasn't until we'd finished that I realised I didn't even get the teeny tiny pot of Coleslaw with my replacement burger. The OH felt that the food wasn't hot enough, I'd agree with this. He also said his Onion Rings, although nice, were just not spicy. Regardless of any of this, we ate it all (well apart from Isla who never eats the whole of anything, unless it's chocolate, ice cream.....).

The OH fancied a dessert and I think Isla thinks that every restaurant meal must be finished off with an Ice cream, so we ordered a Yankee Doodle, which the waiter wisely advised us we could easily all share - it was enormous, vanilla, strawberry and chocolate ice cream with a massive topping of whipped cream! While the OH and Isla made their way through that I had to take Noah for a little walk round the restaurant because he was getting narky. He cheered up on sight of the balloons and the manager gave him one to play with which was great (Isla soon snaffled it though).

The bill came to around £44 (sorry I wasn't on the ball enough to remember it exactly!) and I think I have mixed feelings about whether it was good value. Frankie and Benny's is great for families, there is no question about that and I liked that I didn't feel frowned upon for having noisy kids or kids that felt like having a bit of a lay down half way through dinner. This mistake over my order could have been made anywhere and it was rectified quickly and without drama. I do think our burgers and chips were slightly over-priced for what they are, oh and I'm pretty sure the ketchup in the Heinz bottles wasn't actually Heinz.... The kids menu is fabulous and priced well. All in all if I was to give it a mark out of 10 I'd say a 7, which isn't bad! Thanks Frankie and Benny's for saving me cooking and washing up after another exhausting day as a working mum of 2.

We were given a £50 voucher to spend at Frankie in Benny's in exchange for a totally honest review

New Shoes!

I love the stage when you buy the baby their first pair of shoes! Noah got his first pair at the weekend and I love them! He is a 4.5 G, which seems enormous to me for a 9 month old. We got them from Clarks as we did with Isla when she got her first pair. The only difference being that for her they did this really sweet thing of taking a polaroid of her in her new shoes and putting it in a little card frame to mark the occasion. They didn't seem to do it this time round which is a shame but I took this picture as soon as we left the shop and they look so cute on his feet!

Kenco Millicano - Review

Since Noah came on the scene my coffee intake has increased about 100%. He doesn't sleep through the night and he wakes up really early. I have to admit that I don't start my day with coffee I always have to have a cup of tea first thing to try and put a smile on my face but by mid morning I'm usually on the coffee to perk me up a bit. When Noah first arrived I was sent some Kenco Instant coffee with no obligation to write a review, it was just an act of kindness on the PR's part (thank you for understanding the tiredness us mums feel!) and I did appreciate it and actually ever since I've been a Kenco convert. We always buy it now.

Kenco Millicano is Kenco’s first ‘Wholebean Instant coffee’, a clever combination of instant coffee and finely-milled beans that is quite simply the closest thing to ‘proper’ coffee in an instant. It offers the convenience of instant with the quality and taste reminiscent of roast and ground coffee.

Recently Kenco have brought out the Kenco Millicano stick packs; individual handbag sized packs so coffee lovers can enjoy delicious Kenco Millicano wherever and whenever they want.

Small in size and individually wrapped, they are the perfect addition to any coffee lover’s handbag – just pop one in your handbag to enjoy your favourite Kenco Millicano coffee on the go; perfect for all the busy women out there who need a quick boost!

I tried the Kenco Millicano at home first as to be honest I didn't really have any opportunities to use it out of the home, as my regular haunts with Noah have delicious coffee anyway. Then on my return to work last week I did take it as I'm not a fan of the coffee brand we have there and we also have a filter coffee machine that makes pretty bad tasting coffee (we actually call it MUD in the office).  All I need to say is that it's really good cup of instant coffee! It tastes like proper ground coffee. I can see that this would be a good thing to carry around say if you travelled a lot. My only complaint is that in my bag full of random adult, toddler and baby items is that the box gets a bit crushed! I'm not sure of the solution to this, a small tin would keep the individual packets clean, dry and impossible to tear but then this isn't really environmentally friendly, perhaps a plastic packet with a resealable zip? Anyhow, this is a small detail and in no way detracts from the product.

Kenco Millicano is £3.99 for the 100g tin and £2.99 for the 85g refill pack. Kenco Millicano stick packs available from February 2012 with an RRP of £1.99 per box of ten. For more information on Kenco Millicano visit www.facebook.com/kencomillicano.

Warburtons Breakfast Products - Review

Warburtons have recently brought out some new breakfast products and a couple of Saturdays ago a big box arrived with the postman just in time for breakfast (he actually wanted to stay when I told him what was inside!).

We got to try Butter Brioche Rolls, Raisin Brioche Swirls, Chocolate Chip Loaf and Warburtons new White Plus Milk and Calcium Bread.

Starting with the patisserie style products, these were absolutely delicious. The brioche products come wrapped singly in cellophane, so no need to worry about opening the packaging for one brioche and the rest going a bit stale or also really handy for taking them out for a breakfast on the go. My personal favourite was the raisin brioche swirls, they were divine. They are filled with creme patisserie and are only 145 calories. They're quite small though, so two needed for my appetite!!

Isla liked the Chocolate Chip Loaf. We toasted it and put a bit of butter on and it was lovely. It really tastes nice and goes well with a cuppa. 

Little snack in the middle of crafting!

The butter Brioche rolls are just how you would expect them to be, they can be livened up with a bit of Choccy Philly I found!

Finally we tried the White Plus Milk and Calcium Bread. Apparently 2 slices of this bread a day gives you 50% of your RDA of calcium and it seems that according to recent research 60% of adults don't understand the importance of calcium in aiding bone development in the early years. The British obsession with dieting could be detrimental to the health of our children as people are misguided into banishing certain foods from their diets. White bread has been seen as a bit of a demon in recent times, but in fact it is a good source of calcium and by cutting it out of our diets we could be missing out on some vital nutrients.

Try the Warburtons ‘Calcium Calculator- Eat Well, Live Strong’ on Facebook: www.facebook.com/warburtons to see if you're eating enough calcium rich food per day.

All in all we loved these new products from Warburtons, they made a nice change from our staple breakfast of porridge and they obviously don't have to be confined to breakfast time, they're good for snacking on too.

We were sent a box of Warburtons Breakfast products to try free of charge. All opinions are my own.

Life Gets Complicated

Tomorrow I go back to work.

My days are going to be very different to how they have been the last 9 months, they are going to get very complicated. Right now they are like this:

Get up anytime between 5.30 and 6.30. Stick Cbeebies on the TV. Milk for kids, tea for me. Administer liquid refreshments, appear to enjoy Postman Pat. Make breakfast, requests taken for chocolate but dismissed and the usual porridge given. Clear up breakfast. Noah likes to chuck it around a fair bit. Take Noah up for a nap, dash in the shower after asking Isla to be a good girl and just SIT and watch TV for a bit. During the shower get called to come with tissue to wipe her bottom, she's done a poo "OK darling, well can you just stay put till I get downstairs, I'm washing my hair". Hurriedly finish shower, rush downstairs to make sure she's not decorated the furniture in poo, she has stayed put, she is great at listening to me I decide.

Usually we're out in the morning, to friends, or playgroup or one of our mums is over. Lunch starts around 11.30, followed by another nap (unfortunately only Noah!). Watch a film as a bit of quiet time for Isla. OH comes home from work and then we generally spend the whole afternoon together as a family, dinner at 5ish followed by bath and bedtime routine.

It's also possible to do some chores (well not many, but some). Life like this is fun but it is also very tiring so now I anticipate feeling even tireder when I throw work into the mix. Especially with a night feed thrown in and the occasional visit to Isla's bedroom for some reason or other.

My week will now look like this:

Monday
ME: work in London from 8.45am to 3.15pm. My commute is 1 hour 15 mins.
Children looked after by my mum at our house until OH gets home from work around 2pm and I'll get home around 4.45pm

Tuesday
As above but MIL doing the childcare
We then have to get Isla over to my parents (30 mins drive) to stay the night so she can be looked after by my mum who will also be looking after my niece
Wednesday
ME: work from home 8.30am - 12.30pm
I take Noah to nursery before work
Isla is with my mum
We then have to fetch Isla or she gets returned and then we take Noah to stay the night at MIL's

Thursday 
ME: work 9.30-5.30 at the office
Isla at nursery full day
Noah is with MIL

Friday
As above except I have to get both of them to nursery before work.

It's worth saying at this point that I'm on my own in the mornings, the OH leaves for work at 5.30am. So my main panic is how the f*ck am I going to get ready in the mornings - especially on Friday's when I have to get all 3 of us ready and at the nursery for 8am and then me on a train by 0809!? I'd laugh if it wasn't happening to me. At this moment I'm typing this and feeling a big knot building itself up in my chest and my head hurts.

So tomorrow I'll have some idea on how this all works and I'll see if I've got what it takes to be a mum of 2 and work 30 hours a week - laughable that this is called part time really - course it bloody isn't!